A sign of a woman's true maturity: "shameless"
what does a woman who lives thoroughly and powerfully look like?
maybe you can find the answer from Zhao Paner in Menghualu.
Zhao Paner was betrothed to Ouyang Xu. with the money he earned from opening a tea shop, he bought a real estate house for Ouyang Xu and subsidized Ouyang Xu to go to Beijing for the exam.
but Ouyang Xu abandoned her for the future after exploring the flowers in high school.
instead of swallowing anger for the sake of face and fame, Zhao Paner took the initiative to go to Beijing to ask Ouyang Xu for an explanation.
if you become an ordinary person, you may accept your fate and be discouraged.
but Zhao Paner is not partial!
she is determined to stay in the capital. In that era of "a woman without talent is virtue", she did not mind appearing in public and did a good job in her business.
later, she not only made the scum man pay the price, but also turned a small teahouse into the largest teahouse in Bianjing.
throughout Zhao Paner's life, she can put down her face and posture, insist on being herself, and walk out of an unusual way of life according to her own rhythm.
as the old saying goes:
"A man wants face, a tree wants bark."
but a woman's true maturity begins with being shameless.
Women who are too shameless tend to live the most tiring lives
as the saying goes:
"save face and suffer."
when you take an illusory face too much, it will make your life bear undue weight.
backstage, some book friends shared her story with us.
she once lent 5000 yuan to a relative and agreed to pay it back in two months.
but two months later, the relatives did not say a word.
she wanted it, but because of face-saving, she felt that her relatives had 5000 yuan, and she was embarrassed to chase others for it.
after two years of this, relatives suddenly asked her to borrow money, saying that they wanted to buy a wedding house for their son.
she wanted to refuse, but the other party was soft and hard, and finally promised to repay the money for half a year and signed an IOU, which barely borrowed 30,000 yuan.
who knows that half a year later, she didn't even see any money.
she thought that everyone was related and didn't want to do things too well, so she invited an elder to make peace.
in fact, there are not a few such things in life:
when you post your travel photos on moments, you will immediately have friends who will ask you to bring local specialties regardless of your itinerary and convenience.
but for the sake of face, you dare not refuse.
when you work hard to make money and save money, you are ready to buy a car and a house, and your relatives say that your family is in urgent need of money.
you clearly don't want to borrow it, but you are afraid that people will say that you have money, so you have no choice but to lend it out.
A woman who is particularly shameless will always care too much about the comments of others and let her life be kidnapped.
but there is a very incisive sentence:
"Life has been much easier since I learned to be shameless."
mature women have long lost face.
face is really not that important.
A woman who gives up face is firm in her heart, will not be shaken by the voices of the outside world, and has a clear understanding of herself, transparent and magnanimous.
the strength of women starts with "shameless"
have read a sentence:
"only shameless people can live successfully."
indeed, the lower the level of people, the better face, the more face, the loss often outweighs the gain.
and the higher the level of people, the more "shameless", life will often give unexpected surprises around the corner.
there is a blogger named Xiaoya online who complains that he has been in the company for five years and has been working hard and conscientiously, but his salary has not changed.
after an analysis by netizens, it turns out that the problem lies with her.
she worked overtime with her colleagues to catch up on the project. after 12:00, all her colleagues had gone home to have a rest, and she continued to work hard alone.
I didn't expect that the next day, my colleague left Xiaoya and went to report on her work alone, and the leader said he was very satisfied.
however, colleagues take all the credit to themselves.
although Xiaoya is dissatisfied, she is afraid to stifle the relationship between her colleagues and is even more afraid of being targeted. She has been unable to embarrass herself and the leader to explain the situation.
the writer Yishu said:
"face is the hardest thing in the world to let go, but it is useless."
whether in the workplace or in life, if you don't fight for what you deserve, you will only give up opportunities and embarrass yourself.
benefits do not come in vain, and opportunities do not fall from the sky.
when you encounter something, the first thing that comes to mind is the core interest, not the so-called face, then you have become strong from that moment.
Let go of face, can you make yourself more confident and calm, and walk wider and wider on the road of life.
A psychology professor at Wuhan University, who wants to know whether there are perfect victims in the world, has done a study on criminal psychology.
the result is distressing: the most perfect victims in the world are those who are obedient.
the professor said a truth.A real case.
when a man was taking a bus, he found a lady who looked very quiet.
in a moment of malice, he slowly leaned towards the girl, just as his hand was about to touch the girl's sensitive part.
this seemingly weak girl, not only did not dare to speak out because of face, but stopped drinking loudly, and mobilized the people around her to take pictures of his face with a mobile phone.
this operation made the man stop in an instant.
it turns out that the reason why this man always succeeded before was that most of the women he harassed were face-saving, swallowed their anger and dared not open their mouth.
for a woman to be strong, she must be able to show her face at a critical moment.
A good life is for yourself, so you don't have to worry too much.
the most fundamental thing is to eat your own food and do your own things.
Let go of face before you can live into Li Zi
there is a line in the movie "the Grandmaster":
"when people live in the world, some live to save face, some live to become insiders.
and only Li Zi can win real face. "
it is impossible for a person to fight for one's breath without face.
however, paying too much attention to face will make it difficult for people to move forward.
those who let go of face live a wonderful life of their own.
this is the case with Wei Minzhi, the heroine of the movie not one less.
Wei Minzhi, who didn't know how to sing or dance, answered loudly, "I will!" when asked if she had any talent.
in front of everyone, she sang a song "our Motherland is a Garden" without restraint and did a self-choreographed Indian dance.
the crew was surprised and asked her:
At a fantastic price look amazing in vintage gown long sleeve wedding! Our unique selections would be the best gift.
"do you dare to make a movie?"
Wei Minzhi doesn't know what a movie is, but her answer is still loud and firm: "dare!"
after a period of competition, Wei Minzhi competed with another No. 1 girl for the heroine.
the staff found an empty house where a camera was set up and asked them to yell at the camera.
the other girl was embarrassed and couldn't say it all the time, but Wei Minzhi shouted as if she were going to tear something apart.
We all know what happened later.
Wei Minzhi shot to fame and said goodbye to the life of chopping wood and feeding pigs.
in fact, the reason why many people miss opportunities in life is that they have too many worries.
but if you lose face, you can live a more courageous and confident life.
Life is short, and when you know that face is the least important thing, you mature.
you will know where your strengths are, and you will be able to accept your own shortcomings. You will not force yourself to feel sorry for yourself because of the preferences of others.
have seen such an enlightening conversation:
"if you only have a decoration budget, will you give priority to decorating the outside or inside of your house?"
"inside, we live inside the house, not outside."
Yes, face is flashy, Li Zi is honor and disgrace.
mature women live on the inside, they follow their heart, speak freely, behave freely, and do things freely, then they will embrace a good life.
there is a passage on the Internet:
"most of a person's maturity begins with being shameless, shameless to seize many opportunities, shameless to have knowledge, and not afraid to be shameless to do great things."
Yes, if you are always thinking about being embarrassed to do it here and there, how can you survive the wind and rain from life?
people who let go of face, can listen to their own inner voice, will take the initiative to find all the good, will not be held back by the outside world, and make life simple.
, for the rest of my life, may every woman lose face and believe that we will meet better ourselves and embrace a life with no regrets.
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